Posted in Self Love

Practicing Positivity

Does being positive and happy come naturally?

Do you think being positive equates to being happy?

Are joy and happiness one and the same?

I’ve been thinking about all of the above lately.

And, I will answer my own questions.

No, No, and No.

I have been focusing on the positive, consciously devoting time to myself and my happiness, and trusting God’s joy is within me. It is constant work, and I am nonetheless a work in progress.

But, I feel like most of us could say the same. I don’t think people genuinely are full of positive energy and happiness ALL the time. Many would like us to believe that, but they are probably lying to us and themselves.

We don’t live in a perfect world, and we all have to make our lives manageable. Life is hard, and I’m not sure where we got the idea that it was anything more.

Life has always been hard.

We all have problems, insecurities, fears, worries, battles inside our own heads, struggles no one knows we are dealing with.

We all sin. We all make mistakes. We all get angry or upset.

And, guess what? It’s okay. We are all imperfect, and we are all human. We all have faults, and we all live behind closed doors.

The best we can hope for, the best we can do is to continue to work on our own flaws and weaknesses.

Each day I wake up and choose happiness. Choose positivity. Choose joy. And, choose to live life with my own instruction book. It’s the only one that makes sense. It’s time to realize that.

Live life to the best of your ability. No one else really matters

Here are some tips to consider when looking for positivity, peace and happiness in YOUR life:

  1. Focus on the positive side of every situation.

It may not always be easy, but remember something good comes out of everything, even the bad. We may not realize it at the time, but there is always something to be grateful for.

2. Don’t compare your life to others.

We may think everyone else is living the good life. No worries, no financial struggles, no illness, no insecurities, or relationship problems, but do we really believe their life is made in a bed of roses. We all have “stuff” we are dealing with, even if we can’t always see it.

3. Don’t believe everything you see or read.

Social media can take you on a fast track in a downward spiral if you are scrolling social media looking for happiness. It’s not there so limit the screen time.

4. Distance yourself from people who steal your peace.

This is a BIG one for me because every week I’m feeling the need to cut someone out of my life, or limit my conversations with them. This is why I don’t call people too often. I can’t stand the negativity, the complaining, the bad moods. And, did I mention the negativity? Solitude and loneliness can sometimes be a blessing, and I mean that. I can’t focus on getting through the storms in my life when someone else is always breathing those negative vibes in my ear.

5. Read positive, inspiring, and self-love quotes every day.

Every day I post quotes on my instagram (@gracelovebiscuits) story to not only remind myself but also help others to remind themselves as well. We all need to encourage one another in a positive way and push negativity out of our minds. No joy or happiness comes from being in a bad or sad mood.

6. Worry about yourself and mind your business.

Choose to focus on your own life and make it better. Keep your business to yourself and respect others’ privacy. Sometimes we don’t have to know everything about everyone, and it’s really not our business anyway. The less you involve yourself in other’s concerns the happier you will be. Focus on life in your household, not someone else’s.

Peace and Love everyone….xo.

Posted in Self Love

The Message

Do you ever feel like everywhere you turn you are being sent a sign or message?

Lately, I feel surrounded by a message. Of course my normal first reaction is to ask that million dollar question.


Why now?

Do I need to prepare for something?

I think the why in many situations helps us understand. It helps us justify. It helps us come to terms with the unknown.

And, I always find myself wondering about the unknown.

I know everyone on this planet has probably at one time or another caught themselves wondering. I guess it’s human nature, and even more true for some of us compared to others.

For me, trust is somewhat of a struggle in general. I don’t know why, but I suspect it has to do with something deeply embedded within me. I tend to be guided by my heart, and sometimes I feel that’s not a good thing because it puts it out there in a wide open space to get broken.

And, it has been.

I always want people to know where I’m coming from, speak my mind in the sense that I’m being honest even when it’s something that someone doesn’t want to hear. The best friends in my world are the ones who are going to get the raw truth from me. If I didn’t care about them I would lie and tell them what they want to hear. In my opinion, that’s not being a good friend.

In return, I want that from my close friends.

But, I will clarify one point. I don’t need that or want that from everyone. If you aren’t there for me on all the bad days, through all the tears, checking on me weekly…that’s not really your place. We all have our people. And, mine know who they are. Our people don’t have the same boundaries as others. Our tribe operates in the same circle as we do. Everyone else is just an outside observer.

Not everyone deserves our trust and not everyone needs it. Certainly, not everyone has it.

I am a work in progress, and I imagine some of you are, too.

I struggle knowing I trust a few select people, and I stumble at times when it comes to trusting the Lord. It’s a battle inside my head, and I wrestle with it. But, probably not in ways you imagine.

I know that trust is what has kept me afloat in this storm I am in. I know it is what wakes me up every morning and what keeps me strong.

I know. But, when it comes to my fate, my future, my security, I grapple with what I cannot see. The darkness is a hard place to reside, especially when there’s not sense to what the lightness will bring.

I want so desperately to have that trust and faith all the time, and I am working towards that goal.

I want that hope.

I want that security.

Making myself happier, more confident, and more aware of the good in my life will get me there. I trust that with all my heart.

Meanwhile, I will be a work in progress, reminding myself each day that I have so much in life to be grateful for, in spite of all the roadblocks. So many blessings to appreciate, and so many reasons to keeping trusting it will all work out.

Trusting in the unknown.



The greater good.

There may not be an answer to the why in that, but there is a how.

And, there’s a message in that.

Posted in Self Help, Self Love

Finding Peace

Do you have peace in your life?

I mean real peace.

People have asked me before if I am at peace with my husband having cancer. I don’t think I will necessarily ever be at peace with that. Not in my forseeable future. But, I’m sure one day, one I cannot imagine, it will come.

It’s difficult to be at peace with a hard-pressed life. It’s hard to accept truths I don’t want to think about. I will say, I am at peace with not being at peace with that. If that’s hard to understand, then you’ve probably never been in my shoes. I don’t think I have a way of explaining it. I just feel like being at peace with it would mean I accept it. And, I’m not ready to do that just yet. I still have hope, and maybe a wish for a miracle.

I feel like I walk through life, day after day, and there’s constantly something happening, something daring me to go and search for my solitude. It can be exhausting at times, overloading my brain with intricate tasks, and adding inessential weight to my already strained shoulders.

I know a healthy person doesn’t live like that. A praying truth seeker doesn’t either.

My goal is to be both.

I am on my way.

During yesterday’s church service I recognized how guilty I am of eluding faith. I am skeptical to trust people often, and I’m regretful of not trusting God all the time. I realize I want things to turn out how I want them to be, but in God’s world I know I don’t get something just because I want it. I have to trust that is how He means for it to be. My mind struggles to let go, but I am a work in progress.

Aren’t we all?

I have discovered finding peace, remaining at peace, takes constant, committed intellect. It is simply quieting my mind in all the chaos. A place where I am silent, my mind relaxed, and I can just simply be.

It is minding my own business, it is avoiding distractions, it is not letting silly incidents upset me. It is not worrying what other people think, it is loving myself, it is accepting, it is letting myself be free. Immune to stress and worry, and insecurites, and most of all the unknown.

Finding peace can be such a simple chore, but only when I take down the walls, trust, and allow myself to let go of all my burdens. Meditate, clear the mind, and just let it happen. But, I know that’s easier said than done.

For me, I try to make a conscious effort to clear the air. With my friends and family, I say what I’m feeling. I have realized I have two choices. I either speak my mind and make peace with it, or I remain silent and make peace with it.

What’s the difference?

The choice is mine. I get to decide what lives in my head.

And, my aim is to not let people or things that don’t belong take up space anymore. I say what’s on my mind, I don’t hold my thoughts and feelings prisoner in my own head. I say it, I pray about it, and I give it to the Lord. It is simply the way it needs to be.

It is my coping mechanism. And, sometimes I fall. But, I remind myself, and then I get back up.

Lose the things, lose the places, lose the people, and lose the noise. Distance myself from all that forges chaos in my life.

Control my thoughts. Tame my mind. Don’t let anyone or anything that threatens my peace have access.

At this moment I am in the midst of a storm in my life. Some days I feel it spinning recklessly, but I know I am stronger. Somewhere within the center of my own peace there is the calmness inside my heart, and I simply just have to take ahold of it and breathe.

Posted in Self Help, Self Love


How are you feeling today?

It’s a question we should be asking ourselves daily. Especially if we are going through some difficult episodes in life. And, I think over the last year we probably would all qualify on that account.

I’ve been on a month long or more hiatus, taking care of my family, and taking care of myself. People say it all the time that we need to take care of ourselves first, but rarely do we do it. Some times our body let’s us know when we’ve reached a critical point though, and we all need to heed the warning.

I felt myself slipping back into a a place I sat for a long while not that long ago, and I knew I couldn’t go back there. I’ve been eating healthy, exercising, and taking time for myself more often. At times I feel selfish for spending time on myself, but if I don’t, who will? It’s a serious question to ask yourself.

It’s easy to feel ourselves slipping when we are aware of the symptoms so make a mental note of the warning signs. Stress really can kill us, and at the very least it can alter our health before we recognize it.

For me, I knew I was struggling, but before I realized it I was sick. And, it’s not a sickness like you may be thinking. It’s a sickness that affects your overall mental and physical health. There are many warning signs:

  • high blood pressure
  • headaches
  • digestive or stomach problems
  • weight loss or gain
  • depression or anxiety
  • sleep problems
  • chronic fatigue
  • chest pain or heart palpitations

And, how do I know?

Because I suffered from all of the signs at one point or another. And, they are all signs of an over-stressed body. Mentally exhausted to the extreme of where I could not cognitively recover on my own.

I am happy to say I still have bad days, but lately it’s no longer bad weeks. I call that a win. Positivity, finding the good in everything, staying focused, entertaining a very small circle, and being grateful are good habits to portray. We are not all going through the same storms, but we are all dealing with challenges in our lives.

Up until this point my path has been filled with darkness, fear, despair. But, as my mind gets stronger, I can see my strength brings light. It is not as if I still don’t have feelings of fear, but I know wherever my path takes me I am more prepared for whatever I may encounter.

I am on a mission. Watch and see.