Posted in Self Help


How many people made resolutions for 2021?

No resolutions for this girl.

This is my first post of the new year, and one I’m writing after a long break. A much needed break!

I never make resolutions. I hate them, and honestly I’m not a big fan of celebrating the new year. I’m a night owl, and even I went to bed before midnight. I think it’s crazy to make a big deal about turning the calendar to a new month, a new day, or even a made up new year.

It’s tomorrow…and that’s all I’ll say about it.

I did use my hiatus for some much needed time with my kids and some searching. Searching for peace, positivity, good vibes, and whatever other blessings I can find.

Needless to say, that wasn’t on the TV, social media, or even in other people. It was simply where it has always been…inside my heart and soul.

It’s 2021 people. Nothing much has changed except my thought process.

Cheers to another year…

10 Ways to Find Inner Peace in the New Year

1. meditate

There are many types of meditation including focused mediation, spiritual meditation and movement meditation.

Depending on what your goals are will depend on what type of meditation you use. I use all three of these depending on my mood and what I want to accomplish. If I’m stressed I focus on my breathing, even if it’s just for two minutes, to try and calm my mind and relax.

For me, spiritual meditation is reading a devotion and spending some quiet time talking to God. I usually play some calming music and use some dōTERRA essential oils. (If you want to learn more about dōTERRA let me know.)

Movement meditation can be yoga, exercise or just a walk. I can always do a lot of thinking and clearing my mind just by walking around the loop.

2. turn off the outside world

Social media and cell phones have made it so easy to get caught up in what everybody else is doing. Take a break and spend less time with your nose buried in an electronic device. Limit your time texting or scrolling and choose to have a conversation with your spouse or kids. Read a book, find a hobby and turn off the news.

Trust me. The less you know about what’s going on with the world and everyone else, the happier you will be.

3. leave the past behind

It’s sometimes hard to do, but the more time you spend in the present the better. Forgive those that have hurt you, get rid of the negativity it created and look to the future. Learn from mistakes, try harder next time and move on. As much as we would like a “do over” sometimes, it’s not always possible. Don’t focus on what you cannot control, or what is said and done.

Sometimes this is hard for me, but I have found it’s not always me who needs the help. I have learned it’s not about letting someone off the hook, but rather letting myself find peace in the situation. I’m not forgetting what happened, but I am using it in order to not let it happen again. Forgive and hand it over to God.

4. disconnect with anything or anyone that makes you unhappy. tighten your circle

We cannot choose our family, but we can decide who and what we surround ourselves with. Choose friends and family that support you, make you feel good, and bring positivity to your life. Distance yourself from everything else. If someone or something makes you unhappy, unhealthy, or brings negativity to your life, rid yourself now.

Tighten your circle! Contrary to the beliefs of those with thousands of followers, not everyone is meant to be your friend. And, when it comes down to it, most of them really aren’t. In times of crisis you will find out soon enough who is there for you and who is meant to be.

If life starts to overwhelm you press pause.

5. do what you want

As my youngest daughter always says, “I do what I want.” It’s kind of a joke, but the more I think about it, the more I say good for her. Do what makes YOU happy. We are all adults, and we don’t need anyone’s approval. Be nice, be considerate and do good, but don’t do something just because of someone else. Other people’s opinions are just that…opinions. We are all entitled to our own. Just because someone says it doesn’t make it true. Focus on the positive and stay true to yourself.

6. live in the moment

Since my husband’s illness, people are always telling me to take it one day at a time. I get sick of hearing it sometimes because that is much easier said than done; however, I do believe we need to enjoy life today and not ALWAYS worry about tomorrow. It may never come.

Be conscious of today’s consequences, but don’t forget to stop and smell the roses every now and then. Some days we just need to do what makes us happy, even if that’s not possible every day.

7. count your blessings

I have learned no matter what we are going through, someone else is going through something worse. In the midst of storms in our life, we sometimes forget to stop and think about all the blessings we have. No matter how big or small, they are there if we simply choose to look for them. Our children, our loved ones, a roof over our head, food on the table, a warm bed, a trip to the beach, a phone call from a friend…we take for granted many of the simple blessings we have every day. Even in hard times make peace with the path you are on.

8. Simplify your life

If there’s one thing COVID has done for us, it’s forced us to slow down and spend more time at home and with our families. In the midst of it all, I’ve realized how much I crave a simple life. I don’t care if I get invited to the party or if people think I’m unsocialable or if I’ve got a new house or a trip planned to the tropics. And, I don’t care what people think I have or don’t have. I’m thankful for my family, and I get to spend time with them. All the materialism in the world, all the friends, all the stuff won’t make me happy, and it surely won’t make life simple.

9. spend more time with yourself

I value time with myself when I get it, but I’m not one to choose to be alone. I wouldn’t choose to go out to lunch by myself or on a vacation or be single; however, there is something said about a person who is comfortable always spending time with their own self.

Get to know yourself, build your confidence, seek your inner soul to find what it is you truly want out of life. We are responsible for our own happiness, our own success, our own doing. When you can be comfortable with who you are, find exactly what you want out of life, it is then you can be happy. Don’t seek that from someone else or you will spend the rest of your days on an endless search.

Don’t be afraid of being alone, be afraid of doing the wrong things and spending time with the wrong people.

10. write it down

If I have learned nothing else, I have learned that words make me feel better. I write down my thoughts. I journal. I blog. I take notes. Simply by writing things down, it helps me work through my mind, my worries, my troubles, my fears, my journey. I won’t say I always find a solution, but I will say more often than not I feel better. And, if nothing else, I can say I did it on my own, with myself.

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